I felt guilty today. I felt guilty because I allowed myself to laugh and smile. I allowed myself to have moments where things felt normal. One of those times where it felt like Jaidon was in his room. It feels too soon to be able to smile. Too soon to be able to laugh. Too soon for anything happy.
It’s not fair to want to smile. It hurts. Why are we allowed to continue on with everything? Guilty.
I just wished that I didn’t feel normal or guilty.